Black Hole of Hopeful Slumpage

someday my update will come…and it will be glorious…i keep reading blogs because. i don’t know why. i am waiting to stumble across something breathtaking, lifechanging, so hilarious i will pee right in my chair and not even think for a second of excusing myself to the restroom until my bladder is empty of urine and my belly is empty of laughter, and until then…i will keep checking…that is my blessing, my reason, my curse.

oh tuesday. stop being a blackhole. when i punch you, my hand doesn’t come back out. and what fun is that? punch BACK at least. remember what i wrote before? about the blood? let’s aim for that. i’m dubious but hopeful.

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i’m sure glad that me dealing with ridiculously petty issues like this:

means i handle big grown-up issues like this:

oh wait. it doesn’t work like that, does it? a doesn’t automatically mean b?
SHIT.

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