All in a Day’s Awkward

this is worrisome. my soldier had been emailing me pretty regularly and suddenly stopped. her first package is in the mail. i hope she’s ok. at the same time, i feel kind of morbid for thinking something happened to her.

on a less relevant note, it’s raining men!

it really is. of course, as soon as i write this, they will all scatter like cockroaches when the lights come on, but it’s nice when the newspaper guy says to his friend, “there’s the girl with the goofy smile. hey lady, you have yourself a nice weekend.” oh baby, i made it goofy just for you, purrrr.

occasionally, you feel like a real waste of space in terms of a sexual object. but other times, you are constantly reminded, that’s more or less what you are in the eyes of many. and then you start getting carried away and seeing everyone else as a potential sexual object as well. like coworkers, street dwellers, the works. and you forget to interact on a basic human level. everything is one weird awkward flirtation. it’s terrible. but it’s the life dance, and it never gets old.

speaking of dancing, i’m just now involved in an intricate couples dance with my brownbag lunch. since i cannot put my little box of noodles and salad on my keyboard. it must go on the side of my keyboard. so then i spear the vegetable on the fork and then it begins its journey, across the desktop, over the keyboard, on a perilous path towards my mouth. the problem with leafy greens are that they do not come with adhesive. they flurry and flit as they will. they gently flee, they fly. away from the fork tines. away from my mouth. onto my keyboard. and thereafter, into the trash. the 5-second rule does not apply in my workspace. there are some real creepy crawlies lying dormant here just waiting to fly into my mouth. and there’s salad dressing all over my workspace. i think i need to take lessons.

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