Fans and Shit

wow. since we last spoke, things have surely been hitting the fans. all kinds of fans. all kinds of things.

the first order of business: the misanthropic writer…now signs his emails m.w.
this is because intern chris told him about my blog, and he could be reading it right this moment! (i won’t flatter myself though)…anyway, he’s all ready for our highway joy trip involving XM laugh radio…

here is what he had to say…

“i cleared our proposed beltway jounrey with all the federal and state
regulations, submitted the permit application to the epa and the clean
air people;

the xm bill is paid and comedy is being emitted on almost a daily basis.”

finally, a mentor who understands me.

i responded: “i’m very excited about this laugh radio field trip. do i have to sign a permission slip??”

he responded:
“if you could bring your vaccination records with you tonight that would be helpful.

Also i require an implantable RFID device, recommended brand Veri-chip, to be in place in case of accident so that you can be transported to the nearest mushroom.

Please wear comfortable shoes, which you may kick off in the car.

In case of a Beltway traffic jam, you should bring a copy of Tristram Shandy: The Lemony Snicket version below is okay.”

what a catch, this guy.

the second order of business: the construction people have returned to our work area. they are literally drilling into the walls that surround our little table cluster. i was a cad and shouted over the noise, “maybe i should just start competing with this drill for noise level!” it’s funny because while the co-workers and i make strangle faces/finger gun to head gestures and YELL LOUDLY during the drilling, the construction workers talk in normal voices and seem to understand each other fine, drill or no drill. it’s inhumane, these conditions.

third order of business: my mother forwarded me an internet video from CONAN. my mother is one hip lady.

fourth order of business: the cough is leaving the building. i would be sad but it’s apparently decided to leave in a giant fanfare of liquid mucous and tissue paper, so condolences will not be necessary.

is it really necessary to get attractive people even for runny nose photos? i feel it detracts from the message.

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