this was supposed to be posted yesterday, but blogger said, nuh uh, no way. so here it is today. better late than clever.
i usually hate rejection. i usually hate it. but i’m making the most of it. i am, i’m making the most of the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows, the walking up to the door of the party and being told to go back home, you’re not wanted here, even though i brought personalized party favors for everyone. i’m skipping home. i’m skipping home while playing songs in my head and bopping it. i’m getting addicted to getting over things. it’s ridiculous how we martyr ourselves in our swollen heads. ah well, any less self-absorption would be a crime! off with her head…it’s not swole enough.
today it looks like my mother dressed me. because i actually look good. large poofy sea green skirt. crisp white princess sleeve button down. movie star sunglasses. i look like a mermaid. a land mermaid. no clamshell bra though. i wish! the parking garage guy winked at me. WINK. i always get winks at the perfect times when i’m feeling sorry for myself and/or doubting i am a worthy piece of meat. well done universe, brava!
even bjork winks.
my mother was freaking out this morning because she couldn’t find her car keys….! i was still in bed when the breakdown commenced. and then i came down the stairs like a sleep zombie to comfort her because she was late for a biopsy she had to perform, etc etc (routine doctor crisis) and she had looked everywhere…and i lean on the kitchen counter and see some keys next to the cereal. “whose keys are these?” i sleepily ponder. “THEY’RE MINE!” she shrieks as she peppers me with kisses, singing my praises all the way to the door. in conclusion, there’s a reason i still live with my parents, this being one of them.
open letter to cubemate
i realized something this morning as i was throwing cheerios in my mouth like a dysfunctional grapeshot launcher. i am really annoying, aren’t i? i’m always eating shit. i never have to deal with the millions of mail merges like you do, and i never make society-required small talk. i just infringe on your space, and you were here first. and you’re preggers and i’m just annoying. anyway, just wanted to say you do a heckuva job. keep it up. you can look at my screen anytime you want.
feeling generous for now, cubesquatter