unemployment ain’t so bad. i’m maxing out all my cards (all 1 of them), and no one can tell on me. because i dropped that frikkin’ deadbeat/worthless POS in phoenix during the weekend roadtrip pitstop.
no sleep ’til cactus
yes. monday and tuesday are the new weekend. this is a breakdown of my week.
MONDAY – weekend
TUESDAY – weekend
WEDNESDAY – homemaker day
THURSDAY – life GOALS day
FRIDAY – rest up for weekend: the sequel
SATURDAY – weekend: the sequel
SUNDAY – weekend: the sequel
this is what it would look like if you embraced both wind power AND the weekend
one day, i’ll wake up and feel useless. in the meantime, my class tonight is getting homemade GINORMOUS chocolate cookies with flour clumps (i dumped in 1 extra cup of chocolate chips),
come to mama
my car’s brakes never felt more shiny and new,
these are a car’s brakes, memorize them
my hair is goth-but-chic-salon-fresh (goth is the new waspy),
more goth than this, pshhhhhhh, but just as fresh
the pilates workout home video debut is today afternoon,
this is the more hardcore stuff. i stick to softcore myself.
i am completely caught up on celebrity gossip — colin farrell’s sister is a hottay, ashlee simpson’s new nose has multiple personalities (tomorrow: world news),
who cares about this stuff? I DO.
i can pencil anyone in WHENEVER & wherever & you can have it your way,
burgers not included
online dating still doesn’t seem tempting,
e-harmony? more like e-harm-many! hiyoooooo
i have 2 craft projects in progress,
the only thing more fun than bunnies? cross-stitch bunnies!
i walk everywhere with purpose instead of slightly defeated-looking (denial?),
self-assurance. you are mine.
the tv is my bitch and not the other way around, i can watch movies when the rest of the theater is empty
i will now be an obnoxious loud soda-guzzling theatre patron
and consider laser eye surgery during my afternoon tea by leisurely flipping through a pamphlet.
ah yes, very good, i shall consider this briefly
stay-at-home college grad, here i come. i even have my parents’ blessing. for now.
every few seconds, i hear a shoe drop. and i’m just waiting to realize it’s mine. my other one, that is.
this sort of happened yesterday when i ate some bad spinach and got the explosive runs at the gym. yeah i said it. i didn’t want you to think my life is all gumption and glamor. when you get the explosive runs at the gym, everyone knows it too.