oh wow. being at the office when completely disoriented and existing 10 hours ahead in time makes for a pot roast of confusion. this morning, i had to have a banana to calm myself the heck down. seriously, the thought process went like this:
me: hey, get a hold of yourself!
me: no, i can’t. my heart is still in india.
me: well, you need to do your work. there is a himalayan range full of it.
me: stop making india references!
me: holy cow! what are you talking about?
me: dammit! hey quick! what’s the lowest common demominator between india and the u.s.?
me: camman! you know this!
me: HEY. GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF.
me: can i phone a friend?
me: NO! never!
me: oh wait! duh! a banana.
me: exactly. a banana. now get one. and eat it.
staring into the peeled face of sanity
photo courtesy of Flickr and massdistraction
so i did. and for two glorious minutes of fruit consumption, there was peace. then it was back to the madness.
which inevitably led to me telling a friend this via the instant message:
if my friends were the mcdonald’s characters
you’d be grimace
i’m a mcnugget
don’t worry you could squash me
but you’re kind of purple and vague
who says that? i do.
photo courtesy of Flickr and tankgrrl
lastly, if you want to cure disorientation and pensiveness on a long airplane ride when you have lots of time to yourself PLUS access to movies, tv, music and more, here is the miracle cure:
–watch the departed
THEN QUICKLY BEFORE YOU HAVE TIME TO GET OVER THE BLOODLUST…
–watch blood diamond (if you’re unfamiliar with the amount of violence in this movie, i direct your attention to the title, hint: the word blood is in it)
THEN QUICK QUICK QUICK WHEN YOU’RE ABOUT TO USE YOUR complimentary toothpick to gouge out your eyes in the airplane bathroom because you’ve lost faith in humanity…
–watch happy feet
ONLY TO HAVE THE PLANE’s INNER ROBOT inform you that there isn’t enough time left in the flight to watch your selection…
–then listen to music like coldplay and snow patrol
and rip out pages of your attempted humor novel to blow your nose.
ALL BETTER. now if you’ll excuse me, i need to decide what to procrastinate on doing next.
here is the photo i wanted to share with you all. this was on a day out with my cousin rahul. we were at the shooting range next to the go-cart raceway. my gun instructor has a fun shirt. particularly pay attention to the random guy in the background.