Sorry to bring the mood down on the blogosphere (on a Friday, no less), but I just truly contemplated the state of my office headphones (before you get alarmed, I brought them from home; there’s no way my company would make me use such shoddy contraptions), and it’s not looking good.

Bear witness to this bull:

First of all, one ear doesn’t even work. This is because the wires got snapped on the left side, and instead of discarding them, I just tied those skinny electric snakes around the earpiece, like some kind of a cockamamie absent-minded inventor would do. But I always listen with one ear off anyway so I don’t miss anything important at work (AKA fire drills).

That’s funny, that looks like an exposed wire. Oh, but it is.

Every time I put them on, I feel a tiny shock, and I just kind of laugh to myself a little on the outside, but curse myself a lottle on the inside. Will today be the day of the impending incident?!

I am afraid one of these days I will sizzle my brain to a crisp while just trying to Pandora or NPR it up, or alternately, catch a whiff of audio from a delightful Internet video.

This office life! I tell ya! Full of surprises from 9 to 5. At least today is payday—now that’s what I’m talking ’bout.

Check out some of this fraying too. Gross. Just gross. Nobody needs to see that. But everyone just did.